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This piece is something I wrote a couple of years ago.. but it is a favorite. I hope you enjoy.

I love Jake.. Funny things happen when that kid is around. He's at that age where he can talk, but you have to be the mom to understand. I often feel like I'm speaking to a fast talking German (I took a little German in college) and I'm catching only every few words and all this makes Jake think I'm a complete idiot.
I went to my sister's yesterday because she wanted to show me the Christmas sweaters she bought for her cute boys. When I got there, I made Jake come and give me a hug and as I'm holding him he says, "buzz blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, spider, blah, blah blah..." I smile and say, "Awesome Jake!" and he rolls his eyes at me. So then I make the big mistake and I show him his new Christmas sweater. "NO! NO! Teef! blah, blah, Buzz blah, blah, blah, blah..." So I ask for a translation and my sister tells me that I have made the faux pa of missing a major holiday. Jake does not want a Christmas sweater, he wants to be Buzz Lightyear for Halloween. Oh, is that the only problem? Simple, "Jake the postman is bringing your costume in a few days and you can wear this nice sweater at Christmas. You can have both."
This is where I get into trouble because my sister leaves the room and now I'm stuck with a small angry person and no translator. Jake says, "No! No! Teef! Blah, blah, blah... Super...blah..." Oh dear. And, I am the idiot Jake thinks I am because I say, "Jake this is a very handsome sweater." Violent head shaking. "NO!! NO! NO!!! Teef (I'm Teef, if you were wondering) blah, blah, blah, bat, blah, blah, blah....." It's now that I have a light bulb moment and come out of my haze. Jake is very smart and I realize that he is trying to trade me the Christmas sweater for the Buzz Lightyear costume first, but he is willing to accept Superman next or Batman if that absolutely won't work. And I'm wishing that I had learned that baby sign language.... "Jake, in 3 moons, postman come, bring Buzz Costume ... to ... Jake."I'm getting smarter so I try re-directing and I put Jake on my shoulders and fly him around the room. But Jake is not easily re-directed. He's very smart and he knows what I'm doing. So from over my head I hear, "Blah, blah, blah Spider, blah, blah....."
I didn't know what to do at this point so I gave Jake a big hug. I completely understand where he's coming from even if we don't communicate well. Jake and I are a lot alike. Actually, I was having a completely frustrating day myself. Things were not turning out. Having this visit with Jake made me realize that atleast I can work on my stuff, Jake is still wondering where the heck the dang mailman is with his Buzz costume and why his stupid relatives want to skip his favorite holiday.


Raquel said...

hahaha! That is a great story, very funny and very well written. Jake seems like quite the character!

Alicia said...

Jake is my nephew, Christine's son. "Teef" is my sister. Christine and Tiffany are practically neighbors. I loved this story. Jake is so funny. Thanks for the post, Teef.